Wednesday 14 September 2011

Moany old tourist not traveller

Taking a brief break from my trundle down holiday memory lane, I remember my other half, during the recent Italy jaunt, telling me I was a bad traveler but I was a perfect tourist. Namely the most whingey, nit picky and utterly British person ever!

Here's a list of the things that I (allegedly) complained about during 11 days in Italy:
1) Italians (rude)
2) Lack of queuing (I agree on this one, it is the most civilised way to do things!)
3) The heat (32 degrees is not good for someone who looks like they live under a rock)
4) Smell of wee (it does smell of wee!)
5) Air conditioning doesn't work well enough (I couldn't feel it)
6) No beans on toast
7) Sick of pizza, and pasta. And icecream
8) Mosquitoes (only got one bite thank god)
9) Feet hurt (I have metatalgia, can't help that one)
10) Italians (loud)
11) Other tourists
12) Horrible, dirty squat pan toilets, far worse than any i saw in India (true)
13) Walking up hills
14) Walking up steps (why is everywhere littered with steps in Italy)
15) Italian standards of service (just file your nails why don't you, not like i am waiting to be served or anything)
16) Sand (hate it when it sticks to suncream)
17) Putting on sun cream
18) Sun burn
19) Ryan Air (I STAND BY THIS)
20) Italians (going on strike)
21) Air travel (like being in a tin can)
22) Screaming children on flights
23) Sick of seeing the leaning tower (6 days in Pisa is TOOOOO long)
24) Italians (drivers not giving way)
25) Italians (pedestrians barging into you)
26) Noise from street when trying to sleep in Riomaggiore
27) Expensive
28) Street sellers harassing you (I have sun glasses on, why do I want another pair?)

There are no doubt more, cementing my place in the most moany tourist category apparently. Also makes me wonder why on earth I travel to begin with! I always seem to enjoy the holiday better once it is over . . .

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